Ya’ll Got Me So Fired Up I Almost Forgot To Tell You I Been Metal Detectin’!

Ya’ll Got Me So Fired Up I Almost Forgot To Tell You I Been Metal Detectin’!

You people got me fired up talkin bout religion and smokin… nothin goes together better. I had a cousin he was one of those second cousins once removed I never knew what that ment but I met him once and was too embarrassed to ask him, but I figured it was once removed from the litter.

I dint let on like we was better than him because he was a famous Christian comedian. His name was Bendy Wagwell and him and 3 women would travel around the country, he would tell Christian jokes (there are still a few around believe it or not) but they were called Bendy Wagwell and the Starlights I think it was.

I still laugh about the time he went up into the north Georgia mtns. It was just a day trip for em but they arrived at this real primitive church. He said everybody was real nice but he noticed one of the members hand was all curled up.  He was thinkin about it when the preacher told him to take the podium, he noticed the guy pull out a burlap sack from behind him and dumped out a pile of venomous snakes.

Well Bendy asked the pastor where the back door was and the pastor said there aint one. Bendy said “Well where do you reckon they want one?” He was really funny second to none. He sent me his tape about two weeks after he died. Well ya’ll got me so fired up I almost forgot to tell you I been metal detectin’!

I use a long mop stick to metal detect , with the head cut off with a long stout finishin Nail sharpened up to a meticulusly fine point, but all I can get is cans and bottle caps.

I did find a pair of pink panties the other day… boy that guy was really mad he chased me completely out of Piedmont Park.  I was tryin to tell the guy I was just pokin around for some treasure that me and the president mighta dropped when the Almond Brothers would come an play for free at the park.

Luckily the cops never came because me and the judge dont fish together anymore.

Last time I went fishin with him I was 17 years old. He told me the next time I got a DUI he was going to have to throw the book at me. I thought that sounded pretty bad. I took the judge at his word and never got the sixth one!


I can’t wait to go again next time, maybe ona’ya’ll can go with me, I’ll bring the finishin’ nails!



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